Life's Mysteries

Over the past couple weeks I have had some mystifying experiences. Things that I can not explain why or how they happen. For instance, I was watching a movie late one night, all by my lonesome. I embarked upon an emotional scene-and the tears began to fall. Though I was by myself I tried to stifle my crying, and in the meantime my left hand started to ache. A few minutes past and my blubbering was over, however, the left hand kept aching. It wasn't just a dull ache but a pulsating, lasting throb that encompassed me for another 15 minutes. Now, lets be honest, this isn't the first bout of "Achy left hand" syndrome that I've encountered, and I daresay it won't be the last. However, I am left mystified to why the aching starts during emotional scenes in movies.... I open that question up for review. Now, experience number two- What is grosser than gross? When you go into a "Women's" restroom, you put down a seat cover, you sit your bum down and it’s wet!!! It goes straight through the cover sheet onto bare skin. Seriously, there shouldn't be any good reason to why the seat is wet. The flushing system is one that doesn't spit dirty water back like some tend to do. There are cover sheets available, so the hovering option should be eliminated. And lastly, we are women; we sit down to pee, no standing up playing some aim and shoot game with our anatomy. Please answer me that...
Now for number three- We recently went out with some friends to a Mexican restaurant; it's pretty much our favorite place to eat bc of the instant gratification we receive with the "all you can eat chips and salsa." Which believe me when I say we take full advantage of that. Anywho, it was during this time of inhaling, chips and salsa, that "IT" happened. Now It didn't occur to me that I may be ingesting these pointy, spicy delights a little too quickly into my mouth, but it seems that that was the case because about 15 minutes of eating and chatting, my right armpit started to ache. Now I know what you're thinking, they must have been really good chips and salsa to have gotten me really emotional-to a point where my appendages start to ache. But that wasn't the case. I can't be alone in this experience-where you eat something and it seems to travel down to a small stomach that unbeknownst to you was actually in your armpit. I looked at my friend Jodi and said, "I think there is a chip in my armpit." It felt as if one of the right angles of the crispy, corn tortilla chips had done a triple sow cow in my arm and lodged itself in the very tender spot of my...right armpit. I know it sounds crazy, but what is that? Why is that? Why does it hurt there? Again, life mysteries leave me mystified. If anyone can hear my plea and impart some wisdom, I would be all ears...